Becoming Fearless
Welcome to Becoming Fearless, the personal growth podcast for YOU if you are ready to overcome fear and step into your greatness.
Our purpose is to help you overcome your limits and have loads of fun along the way, unlocking your fullest potential in life, business, health and relationships every single day.
I'm your host Charlotte Carter, a high performance coach and entrepreneur, with over 20 years experience. I've supported many highly driven talented people like you who dream big and are ready to take action to overcome what’s holding them back.
Each week my guests and I will be sharing hacks and habits on how to build self belief, courage and confidence to master your mindset and navigate your emotions - so that you reach your human potential in a way that feels light, fun and easeful and help you become fearless.
Let’s go!
Becoming Fearless
11. Fear Of Success: Why Are You Afraid Of Being The Best Version Of Yourself?
Ever wonder what's really holding you back from stepping into the life you've meticulously mapped out on your vision board?
Join me on a thought-provoking journey as I confront the fear of success that lurks in the shadows of our grand plans. Whether it's in business, health, or relationships, I'll peel back the mental barriers and shine a light on the true meaning of success—a concept that's uniquely defined by you.
I cover:
- Why people fear success
- The importance of clarity in defining success
- The need to address the fear of holding success and working on building energetic capacity
- How fear of success and fear of failure are linked
- Reframing your mindset from scarcity to abundance
- Learning to embrace the journey of navigating and overcoming the fear of success
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Welcome to Becoming Fearless, the personal growth podcast for you if you are ready to overcome fear and step into your greatness. Our purpose is to help you overcome your limits, have loads of fun along the way, unlocking your fullest potential in life, business, health and relationships every single day. I'm your host, charlotte Carter, a high performance coach and entrepreneur with over 20 years experience. I'm your host, charlotte Carter, a high-performance coach and entrepreneur with over 20 years experience. I've supported many highly driven, talented people like you who dream big and are ready to take action to overcome what's holding them back. Each week, my guests and I will be sharing hacks and habits on how to build self-belief, courage and confidence, to master your mindset and navigate your emotions so that you can reach your human potential in a way that feels light, fun and easeful and helps you become fearless. Let's go. Hello and welcome to another episode of Becoming Fearless. I am really excited to bring this topic to you.
Speaker 1:This is a solo episode on the fear of success. Why are you afraid of being the best version of yourself? Why are you afraid of being the best version of yourself? Fear of success. Now, this is such an interesting one because so so many people that I speak to have these great ideas, these great passions. They have this real clarity on what success is going to look like for them. They're going to be doing this thing. They're going to be spending their money in this way. They're going to be showing up in this way. They have a real good idea and clarity of what success looks like. They're like yeah, I know exactly what I'll be doing. I'll be, you know, holidaying twice, three times a year. I'll be working in this way. I'll be doing this. They have a real sense of knowing, of actually what the success is, and they also have a huge fear of it.
Speaker 1:So let's dive deeper onto this topic for you all. Let's dive deeper. I love, love, love this topic because it is multi, multi, multi-layered. So, first of all, the first question for you to explore for yourself is in terms of fear of success is in terms of fear of success. Are you clear on what success looks like for you? And are you clear on what success looks like for you in all areas of your life? So in business, in health, in relationships, in family, in all of the different aspects of your life? Are you clear on what your version of success is in those particular areas and then holistically and overall, what your lifestyle looks like and ultimately, how you show up in that lifestyle, how you carry yourself in that lifestyle. That's the first piece to think about. You've got to get clear on that, because once you're clear on that, we can dive deeper into the fear of success.
Speaker 1:So if you're not clear on what success is, just take a moment to imagine yourself with like a clean slate, a whiteboard that you're just opening. There's brand new markers and you're creating from scratch the reality that you'd like to create as what would be a successful life for you. What would it entail, what would you be wearing, what would you be doing, who would you be hanging out with, what would the business look like, what the experiences you would be doing, where would you be connected? All of those kind of things and really sit in the space of imagine. If this was possible, this is what I would really love to create in terms of a highly sustainable, successful life. So when you've got that clear and this pattern of success, this vision of success, is really clear for you and you're feeling good and it feels like, do you know what? I would feel absolutely on top of the world if any element of this came true for me. If I could bring all of this into my life, I would feel so, so good.
Speaker 1:And then let's talk about fear of success, which is, ultimately what are you afraid of in this visualization, or this image, or these notes on the whiteboard, or the pictures on the whiteboard that you have created? What are you afraid of in terms of any of the elements of what's on that image for you, what's on that vision for you? And it falls into many, many, why so many people can do the vision, they can hold it. They're like, yeah, this is what success looks like for me, but I don't actually know how I'm going to get there and I'm really scared of it is because it's too far away. It's like I know I've called the business, I Dare to Leap, but that's one heck of a leap from where you are now to all of the things on that vision, and so people can identify with it, but they can't necessarily connect truly to it because it feels so far away. It feels so far away and that's where the fear comes from. It's like I can really see myself doing all these things, but I don't actually know in reality if they're ever going to happen. So I'm scared of that. I'm scared of having the image and the potentiality in my mind and then not even ever getting there.
Speaker 1:And one of the biggest areas that fear of success underpins or underlies is the whole concept of scarcity and lack. Because if we were feeling abundant being the opposite of scarcity, if we're feeling wildly abundant, we would be like do you know what this success is? All here for the taking, I am here for it. All it's going to roll out in my life in a way that feels just brilliant and I am going to be relishing and cherishing every single moment. But when we come from a space and a place of lack or scarcity or not enough a very common energetic standpoint that people find themselves in lack, not enough, I haven't got enough time, I haven't got enough space, I haven't got enough money, I haven't got enough creativity, I haven't got enough clients, whatever it may be. Creativity, I haven't got enough clients, whatever it may be, there's not enough to go around. I am stuck in comparsenitis. I'm not good enough.
Speaker 1:Whatever fear comes up, that's secondary, that's hiding this fear of success. You're coming to it and facing it head on from a state of lack, from a state of scarcity and I've personally experienced this a number of times and I've worked through it. One of the things that showed up for me when I really leaned into a successful life, the first thought that came into me was what am I going to lose? And, more importantly, who am I going to lose? What is going to be the negative of having that successful life? So, for example, will I lose my family, will I lose my friends, will I lose my whole identity? And ultimately we do lose parts of ourselves. That's part of our growth, that's part of our expansion, that's part of the excitement of the success. It's also part of the lack mindset.
Speaker 1:When you work through fear of success and you look at it through the lens of abundance, possibilities, limitless opportunities, you start to look at it with that powerful reframe of what am I going to gain? Who will I be? How much fun will I have? What other opportunities are out there? How can it get better and better? What are the things that are going to make it feel easeful? All of those things. You start to see the gaps from where you are now and that whole success vision in a very different lens. So that's the first element of fear of success. So that's the first element of fear of success. Are you coming from a lack, not good enough, scarcity mindset, and can you invite yourself to stand strong in a growth, abundance, expansive mindset?
Speaker 1:The second part of fear of success in my opinion, opinion and in the clients that I've seen work through this is will I be able to hold it? So they've put things on their vision board, whether it's clients, whether it's numbers in a program, whether it's a certain amount of money, whether it's holidays, whether it's experiences, whether it's a new car or a new house, whatever it is, it's going to cost some sort of financial exchange. And can you then hold that exchange? So say, you're setting yourself up for a certain figure a month. Can you then hold it for the next month and the next month and then the next month? And that's what happens for fear of success as well.
Speaker 1:Some people are like do you know what I'm really fearful? But now I've got it, now I'm absolutely scared. Is there anything that I'm going to hold it? And then I'm so scared that I'm actually focused on being scared. So then I withdraw, I shrink and then I get what I would call a success hangover and I retreat away. This is when you have that wild success that you've actually craved for, that you really really wanted, but you've not integrated your energy in it, you've not integrated yourself in it, you've not integrated your belief in it, you might feel like it's a fluke, the old imposter comes in, and so you get what I would call a success hangover, or a vulnerability hangover, and you're like, wow, I've got to sit back down now. I really achieved so so much, and now I just can't hold it.
Speaker 1:So that's the second part of fear of success. When you get it, can you hold it? Have you got a fear of holding the success? You get it, can you hold it? Have you got a fear of holding the success? And underlying that is your energy, your energetic capacity, your belief, your nervous system, your sustainability, your grounded tools and techniques, and then multiple things sit underneath that fear of success pattern, if that is you. So, first of all, we have looked at the lack, scarcity, and you want to reframe yourself into the growth, abundant mindset way of thinking. Then we've looked at can you hold it? And that's all about your energy and your energetic capacity for grounding and expanding and sustaining.
Speaker 1:So, finally, the third one that I wanted to bring to your attention is are you also in the energy of fear of failure? Are you more in that failure? So you have the duality of both fears playing out for you. It's like what if nobody turns up? What if it happens? I might as well not put it out there, I'm not good enough, I'm just going to fail. Everything's going to fail. I'm not ready, I'm not this, that and the other.
Speaker 1:Or if it works, is it actually going to work? Is it going to be something that's going to be work and sustained working? Is it actually the fear of it going so well that actually triggers your fear of failure? Because if you sit yourself in the space of everything feels so easy, everything feels exciting, alive and expansive, and you know what? This is going to go really well, and I'm going to put this out and it's going to go really, really well. It's going to be really successful. It's going to fly off the shelves.
Speaker 1:What comes up for you? Because that's ultimately where the work is. We want to get into that energy of success is safe, success is sustainable and success is totally available for you and you can hold it forever and a day and have more of it. So what comes up for you when you hear those words. How does it feel in your body? How do you know if it feels like you're able to work through some bits and pieces and what are the next steps? Do you dip into fear of failure? In this piece? Have you got a real duality, a real partnership with success and failure a lot of high performers have. Their habitual pattern is fear of failure. Then they start seeing success, then they start the fear of success and because when they're in the fear of success and they're really afraid of how good it can be, they then drop into their oh my goodness, well, it's not going to be that good and why was I to think about it? And they drop back and they hide and fear of failure starts to run at the show.
Speaker 1:So I wanted to bring this episode to you because it's a multi-layered experience for people and it shows up in different guises. So I personally have worked through it as I got up to multi-six figures. I've worked with people who are at multi-six seven figures, eight figures on this particular fear of success. My invitation to you is to really consider what success is for you. How does it feel in your mind, your body, your heart and what are the pieces, as you listen to this episode, that come up for you like, oh, okay, that feels like it's a part of it. That feels like a part of it because I will be creating more episodes on this topic, because it's one of the most prevalent fears that I see in all of my clients and it's one that actually, once you navigate it and find your rhythm of life around this, you can embrace it, you can walk with it, and that's the journey that I will be taking you on on all of these fear episodes. How can you walk with that fear, how can you be brighter than that fear, how can you feel more energized than that fear, and how can you acknowledge it and learn from it and then move through it? So I'm excited to see and read what you all think about this particular episode. Let me know, send me a DM on Instagram or send me an email All the details are in the show notes of how you can get a hold of me and I will be bringing out more on this particular topic, because it is so, so juicy and such an inviting topic to consider.
Speaker 1:Why are you afraid of being the best possible version of yourself, being the best possible version of yourself. Another element to consider is the identity piece. Who will I be when I am the best possible version of me, of yourself? And that's a whole other episode. So take care, have fun, feel into the fear of success, understand yourself, understand your life, your health, your well-being, your purpose, your passions, and tune in to more episodes to understand what other fears may be showing up behind or underneath your fear of success. Take care, everyone. Thank you for tuning into this week's episode. I hope that you're feeling energized, fearless and inspired to take action today to stand in your greatness. I share even more tools and resources on my I Dare to Leap email newsletter. By signing up, you not only get early access to the I Dare to Leap products and services, but you also get brand new podcast episodes delivered straight to your inbox every Monday, meaning you'll never miss your weekly dose of Becoming Fearless energy. Sign up now at wwwidaretoleapcom. Forward slash newsletter or click the link in the show notes below.
