Becoming Fearless

61. How I Used Hypnotherapy To Change My Life with Julie Bale

Charlotte Carter

Julie Bale's incredible journey from a professional singer plagued by performance anxiety to a hypnotherapist helping others overcome similar challenges is nothing short of inspiring!

Take a listen as we unravel Julie's pivotal moment at the Royal Opera, Covent Garden, where anxiety nearly derailed her career, and discover how hypnotherapy not only revived her passion for singing but also sparked a mission to support others through her transformative weight loss course, "The Real Me Isn't Fat." This episode sheds light on the universal struggle with self-doubt, whether you're on stage or navigating the entrepreneurial world, and the profound impact of building self-belief.

We explore the complex dance between inner conflict and self-perception, as Julie shares her lifelong battle with weight and the societal labels that shaped her self-image. The discussion highlights how hypnotherapy helped her rewrite her story, offering a powerful tool for confronting insecurities and fostering self-awareness. Julie's insights resonate with many, especially women who excel professionally yet grapple with self-doubt about their appearance. Our conversation underscores the failure of traditional diets and the importance of a holistic approach to self-acceptance and well-being.

Beyond the narrative of overcoming fear, this episode dives into the transformative potential of self-hypnosis for personal growth. Julie opens up about the daily practice required to reinforce positive mental habits and shares practical techniques for embedding healthier thought patterns. Learn how her lifestyle course, "East Meets West," combines chakra energy work, yoga, and healing to empower profound life changes. Discover how self-leadership and the right wellness modalities can pave the way for lasting transformation, redefining how we perceive and achieve personal growth.

CONNECT WITH JULIE

Website: www.juliebale.com/book

Facebook: www.facebook.com/groups/therealmehypnotherapy

Instagram: www.instagram.com/juliebalemindtraining

LinkedIn: http://linkedin.com/in/juliebale

Julie's book recommendation: The Lord Of The Rings by J R R Tolkien

CONNECT WITH CHARLOTTE

Website: https://www.idaretoleap.com
Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/iamcharlottecarter
LinkedIn: https://www.linkedin.com/in/idaretoleap

Join my Becoming Fearless Community on Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/groups/thebecomingfearlesscommunity

Sign up to receive my weekly newsletter, packed full of high performance hacks, positive vibes and fearless energy:

https://www.idaretoleap.com/newsletter

Interested in working with me? Schedule your free no-obligation call here:

https://api.leadconnectorhq.com/widget/bookings/charlottescalendar

Speaker 1:

Welcome to Becoming Fearless, the personal growth podcast for you if you are ready to overcome fear and step into your greatness. Our purpose is to help you overcome your limits, have loads of fun along the way, unlocking your fullest potential in life, business, health and relationships every single day. I'm your host, charlotte Carter, a high performance coach and entrepreneur with over 20 years experience. I'm your host, charlotte Carter, a high-performance coach and entrepreneur with over 20 years experience. I've supported many highly driven, talented people like you who dream big and are ready to take action to overcome what's holding them back. Each week, my guests and I will be sharing hacks and habits on how to build self-belief, courage and confidence, to master your mindset and navigate your emotions so that you can reach your human potential in a way that feels light, fun and easeful and helps you become fearless. Let's go.

Speaker 1:

Hello and welcome to another episode of Becoming Fearless. I'm really excited to bring this episode to you. It's a guest episode and it's with somebody that I've only really just crossed paths with recently, and her story is phenomenal, and I only bring guests onto here that are going to really elevate how you see yourself, how they have navigated their journey around fear and, ultimately, how you can change your life, change your perspective, change who you are in a moment, in an instant, and then choose how you're going to work out, how you're going to do that, in terms of what tools, techniques and support that you need to be able to move you from a place that you might feel fearful to a place where you feel fearless. So, julie, would you like to introduce yourself to the world? What you do?

Speaker 2:

Yeah, hi, thank you. Thanks so much for having me on, charlotte. It's so great to be here. I'm Julie Bale. I was a am a professional singer, but I work now as a full-time hypnotherapist and sing for fun, which is the best of both worlds for me, and that came about.

Speaker 2:

I discovered hypnotherapy through needing really to find a way of dealing with that fear in performance that I had. I had been performing for a long time, many years, but I was offered an audition at the Royal Opera, covent Garden, and this was a big deal for me, and although I hadn't really suffered with nerves beforehand, the moment that I got into this audition, suddenly it hit me like a ton of bricks and I could not function. I had all of the symptoms of performance anxiety I had sweaty palms, I couldn't breathe which is not great if you're going to sing and chaotic thoughts, and I was terrified and I couldn't even speak to the other auditionees who were with me at the stage door, which is absolutely not like me at all, and I didn't recognize this in myself. And I did the audition and it was okay. I sort of did it on complete autopilot, though, and afterwards I thought I've got to find a way to be able to deal with this, to be able to not have these nerves, not have this self-doubt, these other voices that were screaming in my head as I was singing. I couldn't focus on what I was doing because there were all these voices that were saying why does anyone want to listen to you? What do you think you're doing here? What makes you think you can do this? They're just going to laugh at you. And all of these things.

Speaker 2:

I had to find a way to get rid of it and, to cut a long story short, I found that in hypnotherapy, I found that there were these exercises. There was one particular exercise that really changed everything around for me, and then I realized that I had to train myself, firstly to help other singers, but also then, as I was doing my training, I discovered lots of other things that I thought, oh, I can use this and I can use that. And that then led me into where we first met, when I was talking about my first book, the Real Me Isn't Fat, which was a weight loss course that I put together with hypnotherapy. That helped me lose 35 pounds in weight, and also my clients have lost similar amounts and much more just by using these incredible but simple and indeed tangible exercises.

Speaker 1:

Brilliant, so I thank you for sharing all of that. I want to start with where I know a lot of my listeners will be at a place, and I want to touch on this whole performance anxiety that you spoke about, because a lot of people, no matter where they are in life, they have there will be an element of fear, anxiety, nerves, doubt that's stopping them, preventing them from taking the next step in whatever it is that they truly desire out of this world. And performance anxiety is one entrepreneurs have it in terms of fear of visibility. They find that they can't go live, they can't sell their services, they can't talk about money. There's all sorts of versions of performance anxiety.

Speaker 1:

Can you remember way back when you had this sort of like realization that that's what was going on on multiple levels? Can you remember the bit before? Had you had niggling about it? Was it the, the actual massive enormity of that audition? What do you think it was? That? That was a few steps before you had this whole aha realization and then went on your path of searching for how it's what, the tools that can help you.

Speaker 2:

So it was really to do with being offered something that clearly I felt was out of my grasp, so it was a self-belief. It definitely started with self-belief. I came from a working class family in Leeds and nobody was musical, so there was no way for me to understand this. There was no measure for me there. I was the first person in my family to play an instrument, to begin with, but then to want to focus on singing, which was most professional singers say that their families often say to them when are you going to get a real job? Because singing is seen as something that you do for fun and not something that you do as a job.

Speaker 2:

So there's always that thought in the whole industry. There's that thought around, but I didn't have this validation there, and so when I went in, the voices that I heard were voices that I have heard all the way through, some real voices and some voices that I'd made up that were saying these things like why are you here? You can't do this? What gives you the right to be here? And so definitely from a self-belief place, but that also, of course, then leads into self-acceptance, and that's the point that I knew that I had to change my thought process. I had to change my mindset. So there was all this work on me that had to be done before I was ready to take that step into fearlessness.

Speaker 1:

I love that and I think that's one of the biggest revelations to people, and it was for me when I first cracked open into the world of personal growth and I had my massive aha moment that changed my life. There was a piece that was very much around wow, I didn't know this about myself, I didn't know this about myself, and then it was like an, an overwhelming who have I been all this time? Have I been playing a different version? You know who am I really? And it's this sense of loss, of feeling scared, the identity piece. That is where you're the most vulnerable.

Speaker 1:

It's this piece that is the classic, isn't it? The breakthrough, breakdown to breakthrough type of thing. And, like you, you say you have to work on yourself, and this is what I really want to get with the listeners here. I want to talk a bit more about. Your journey is that you have to open yourself up to receiving more awareness, acceptance, belief to be able to be brave enough, courageous enough to then go. Oh, do you know what? I can now take all this knowledge, this learning, and then really create a ripple effect in the world. So let's talk about the similarities with the singing and the performance anxiety, with the whole weight loss book launch. You know you in your body journey yeah.

Speaker 2:

So, although I had had lots of success as a singer there had always it was always there right from I'd always been bigger than everyone else. So there's a. There's a photograph of me as a child at a pantomime. You know, you know the old pantomimes where they would, they would call all the kids up onto the stage to do something, and I'm there, aged about I don't know five, six, something like that, and you can see there's this row of kids and they're all a similar sort of height, and then there's a massive beanpole in the middle and that was me.

Speaker 2:

I was always the tallest. I'm not particularly, I mean, I'm five foot eight. I'm not particularly very, very tall, but I was always taller. So I always felt bigger and that was the label that I was given. And, of course, in those days I didn't realize that I had any control over that. I didn't realize that I had any control over my own thoughts or over other people's labels on me, and that's where I lived, becoming a bit of a. Well, I was the tallest, so I wanted to not be seen, so I would hide. I was introverted and a people pleaser, therefore, and so everything that they said I agreed with, and so that took me actually, that's really probably what took me into my first diet. Because other people said oh, you're big, you need to lose weight, you don't conform, you're not the same size as everyone else, and so I felt I needed to be the same as everyone else, and so I went on to this lifelong diet.

Speaker 1:

And I'm sure there are many, many listeners who resonate with that in their own personal realizations of how they really, how people's spoken words and people's views and people's opinions will always shape you. They will always shape you until you become more aware, become more open that actually you get to shape your own views first. So talk with me a little bit about when did you start the performance and when were you still on this diet piece. Were they going hand in hand? Talk me through a little bit about that journey. Did they run parallel?

Speaker 2:

the the way.

Speaker 2:

Issues have always been there and I've always been a singer, so I think there were, uh, two conflicting parts in a way, because being be and this happens so often with performers you know you go out on the stage and you become someone else, and it's easy to do, and I'd always found it easy to do that until this day when I didn't, when suddenly I was terrified and everything hit me and I realized I had to do that If I wanted to continue as a performer.

Speaker 2:

Then I had to get rid of the terror which led me then to finding hypnotherapy, which then led me to finding, you know, coming full circle and finding the answers to my weight loss issues as well. But it was always there and I think for so many I work with men as well, but mainly women for so many women there is always that, oh well, you can do all of that, but you still haven't dealt with your weight issues, have you? And it had become. It was just always there, this thought always there at the back of my mind whatever you achieve, there's still the fact that you're overweight.

Speaker 1:

I want to touch on that duality of life, because there will be people that have a similar duality going on, where they have a similar thread about how they feel about their weight and a similar piece in their life where they are excelling skills. And it's this duality that I think so many people struggle with. It's like a push-pull because like well, how come I can be this version where I'm, on one hand, living my best life and really excelling in the ripple effect, I'm bringing a lot of joy to people and to myself, I'm feeling really great, and how can I have this other part of me that is still hiding and still not admitting that it would be great to feel different about my weight?

Speaker 2:

I think for me, that came through my belief system, so I had taken on board these beliefs that I had been given from other people that I needed to be. And when I say other people, I don't just mean people around me, I mean the media, I mean GPs. I have so many people I work with say to me I don't go to the doctors because the minute I go they make me stand on the scales and then they humiliate me. This happens such a lot, particularly quite often to people who have been on diets and are constantly on diets. I would say diets don't work. They're not the best way to lose weight because they're not changing what's going on in your head.

Speaker 2:

And this acceptance that we search for has to begin with self-acceptance, and that was the thing that I learned, that I never knew and that I still work with on a daily basis. I know you talk about stepping into fearlessness, stepping out of fear, but I think that is a daily decision. It comes to us and we go no, I'm going to be this person now. I'm not going to be that person, but realizing that you are in possession, you can be in possession of tools that can help you to assess first. Well, as you said, awareness first of all. Become aware of these thoughts, feelings, habits, behaviors that are holding you back, and then realizing that you have the power to decide which ones you are going to accept and which ones you're going to delete.

Speaker 2:

And that's the work, isn't it? And it's constant work. It's not. I'm done now. I have finished the work on me. It's constant, it's there and we've got years of it to work through. But the joy is that when we do that, we do start to discover and uncover the real us inside that one. We were talking about that duality before you know, being able to uncover who the real you is in the end, or who you want your real you to be.

Speaker 1:

This is exactly true and I think some people get scared when I talk about you. Know the work is never done. We're forever students. But I want to just clarify what that means.

Speaker 1:

When you first go into this work, like Julie and I have gone into in big ways, there is a real shedding of identity of the old you. There's lots of learning, it feels uncomfortable, you're working through a lot of stuff and it has an element of heaviness while you wade through the treacle. When you move through that and you start to see the ripple effect of the benefits of the changes and you start to feel better and feel good and you start to get to a more balanced version of yourself, the next piece of learning is like your up level. It's like the net where you're going. It's like the futuristic, it's the other things that come in. They're not going to be like this first piece. They come in different ways.

Speaker 1:

As I say, all along, fear will always walk with you. It comes up, it shows you just got to be able to be bigger than the fear and be able to navigate it in a way that feels good. So let's talk about hypnotherapy, because I'm a hypnotherapist. I love it, I love it. I remember when I was first hypnotized and let's talk about why you love that, why you use that, why it's important for you to use it as a tool with your clients and in your business and for yourself yeah, I mean, as you say, I absolutely love everything about hypnotherapy.

Speaker 2:

Firstly because I am really keen on having tangible tools for change. You know, I know that I have tools, this particular tool that I said, that completely changed my life, which is really a case of thought swapping. So, taking a scenario where you usually feel so, once you've figured out what the things that are stopping you are, what the negative thoughts that you say to yourself on a daily basis are, once you make a list of those and you realize it's quite shocking, isn't it? You know it's anyone who hasn't done that exercise before. Suddenly you've got this, you go, wow, no wonder I feel rubbish. I'm saying all this stuff to myself on a daily basis. But then what hypnotherapy does is you can take one of those scenarios, take yourself back to a time when you felt it, really feel it, and understand that if you change those words, you change that thought, you say something different, it makes you feel differently and so, consequently, then you can choose to think the other thought and with practice, that becomes the habitual thought. So just let me give you an example of that.

Speaker 2:

So, when I was working as a singer, but I was asked to take charge of a choir and I started working as a choral conductor. And I started training because I'm huge on education. I want to. If I'm doing something, I want to know everything that I can know about it. I started training, doing conductor trainings.

Speaker 2:

But what happened when I was going into a rehearsal one day was suddenly this thought in my head again said what makes you think that you're qualified to stand in front of a choir? Why would a choir want to listen to you? You're not a qualified conductor. You're not conductors in my world. They are not in the world, but in my world, conductors were usually men, they were usually organists and they were usually right handed.

Speaker 2:

And I'm none of those things. And I thought, oh, why would anyone want to listen to me? Why would anyone want to listen to me? And taking that thought and instead of having that thought, changing it to I have all the resources I need, my choirs love me and we're going to have fun. And running those thoughts through my head instead working through that, embedding that with hypnosis, meant that then that very evening when I went into my choir, rehearsal immediately comes no, hang on, I have all the resources I need, my choir loves me and we're going to have a lot of fun and it was the best rehearsal I'd ever done and I realized that that particular exercise, just one little hypnosis exercise, could be used for everything, for so many different conditions, you know, and um, and it really was life-changing.

Speaker 1:

I think there are. So many people have an awareness that the power of our thoughts can change our life. A lot of people have that awareness, but I know, from the work that I do and the work that I've had, that you are opening yourself up to, that you are being able to hold is another one, because I remember a lot of people yeah, I'll do that, I'll do it for a bit and then they'll default back because it's all about the habits you have to keep. Like you've said, this is like a muscle to keep embedding and integrating those new thoughts, because some of them might have been with you for 10, 20, 30, 40, 50 years, for a lot of your life, and so there's going to be a default running pattern there.

Speaker 1:

With hypnosis, the power of it is that it can change and, like Julie's just said, you can have moments in your life where the old programming would have got you walking out the door and the new programming brings a load of fun and joy and laughter and that energy is emitted to everybody. It is very, very powerful. But I always say to people it's about doing the work, it's about you know, I don't want people listening and thinking yeah, that's'll just do that once I've nailed it. It's not like that. Let's talk a little bit about that, about how you work with people and what are the? You know, how long do you work with people? What are the kind of like outcomes you get, so that people get a real feel of they're listening to you and they're like and this is what and this is what I need. I know this is right. How do you wrap it up for people?

Speaker 2:

Yes, so I really believe in self-hypnosis and that's what I explain to my clients when we start. Yes, I am going to show you some tools we're going to create between us. We're going to figure out the tools that you need from my hypnosis toolkit that are going to work for you to help you to just step into your full potential, your true self or whatever goal it is that you have. And then it's learning this self-hypnosis, which is a discipline you know, and most people will do the exercises on a daily basis, but certainly it is, as you said, habits. We need to create these new habits Now.

Speaker 2:

The joy of building a self-hypnosis habit is that it is also like a meditative process. It's relaxing, it's calming, it has all of these things that we all need every day. So having that, but then adding into it what the hypnosis does is it adds into it this suggestion, these suggestions, these ideas for future benefit for you. So it is like a meditation, but it's going to give you some tangible results, something that's going to move you forward once you practice that on a daily basis. But what it is not, it is not magic, it's not a quick fix. There's no such thing as a quick fix. Is there really, to be honest? There are things that work quickly, but there's no such thing as a quick fix. Is there really, to be honest? There are things that work quickly, but there's no such thing as a quick fix. With the weight loss, for instance, it's not going to happen instantly. I can give you tools which will help you to feel that your appetite is completely suppressed and that your digestion is slowed, but you have to then sit down at every meal and say, hmm, I have a really small appetite when I start to eat. I only need to eat a few mouthfuls and then I am full and create that belief, and create and embed and strengthen that belief for yourself, and that's the same with everything.

Speaker 2:

Just two other things that I thought of while you were talking.

Speaker 2:

I've been working with a client recently, and you were talking about muscles, and I've been working with her on her no muscle, and this is something also that we find an awful lot with, again, with women who tend to be running around doing a million jobs Although, of course, this can be with men too but in my experience, the clients I've worked with on this have been women and just sitting down and thinking about if they had a no muscle, how would that work?

Speaker 2:

Has been really, really helpful for this particular client I've been working with, who now has decided that a Tuesday is going to be the day that she only does things for herself. And when people say, can you do Tuesday? She exercises her no muscle and, of course, like any muscle, the more you use it it, the stronger it gets, and we are so many of us not very good at saying no, are we? Because we want to make, make people feel feel good and uh and all of that kind of thing. So that's something that's been working really, really well at the moment with clients as well and then there was a one other thing.

Speaker 1:

I think you said there were two, was there another one? Yeah, there were.

Speaker 2:

There were two, but I can't remember what. That other one was right and that's fine, we'll roll with that.

Speaker 1:

It's gone out of my head right now okay, so let's wrap up in um terms of let people know a little bit about how they can get in touch with you. We will put all the details of how they can get in touch with you, um, below the show notes so that people can get in touch with you. We will put all the details of how they can get in touch with you below the show notes so that people can get in touch. But what are the ways that you work with people?

Speaker 2:

So I work with people one-to-one online and that is the most transformative way of working with me, because we can do things really bespoke, then really figure out exactly what you need. I can go through my toolkit, as I've said, and figure out exactly what you need, because sometimes people come to me for weight loss Obviously, that's what I'm known for, this weight loss program that I've created but once they've started to lose the weight, then that layer is uncovered and they realize that actually they really would like to do some work on self-esteem, or their stress levels are really high and they'd like to work on stress and anxiety, or they don't sleep very well at night and they want to do that. So that's the most transformative area, the most bespoke thing that I do. But I also run courses. I've got a course that's running at the moment which is a little bit different and is called East Meets West, which is much more of a lifestyle course. So it's still.

Speaker 2:

This one is still a weight loss course, but it has added in and I know that you're really interested in energy as well, charlotte, so this has added in the chakra energy work that I did with singers. Beforehand. I ran courses for singers and using the chakra energy for performance and it has a little bit of healing and it has some yoga. So the mind, body, spirit connection. So that is a six week course that I do as a small group course and those are really the two main ways of working with me at the moment. Sometimes I run that course just as a Pure, the Real Me Isn't Fat, which is the name of my book, just as a Real Me Isn't Fat course, but this one is being run with these extra modalities in there, just to see if that can help with lifestyle change, which is what I'm finding lots of people are needing at the moment. You know they're wanting this holistic wellness package so people can get in touch with me. It's really easy to get in touch with me.

Speaker 1:

My website is juliebalecom, so that's an easy way to get to me, but I'm also on Facebook and LinkedIn and Instagram, all the usual places and all those usual places will be underneath the podcast for you to click on and go and see what Julie's up to and book a call if you feel like she's going to be someone who can really help you live your best life, your best life.

Speaker 1:

So the last question that I want to ask you, which is what I ask every single guest, is about, you know, part of their personal growth and part of their way of navigating through their limits, their fears, their struggles, their stretches to be able to be in a place where they are, you know, absolutely nailing. What it is that they do is a book that they may have read or listened to. That's had a massive impact. So I'm really curious, because I haven't looked at the notes on this one. I don't know what book you're going to say. So I'm really curious about what you're going to say, because what happens is I just put these all on the list and then I just go buy all of my guests' recommendations if I haven't read them. So I'm eager, I'm keen for you to share what's a book that's made an impact for you.

Speaker 2:

I'm eager, I'm keen for you to share what's a book that's made an impact for you. Well, I think my book might be very different to what other people have said, because the book that I'm going to say, or the series of books that I'm going to say, is the Lord of the Rings, and the reason for that is that it has as an allegory all of the way that I want to live life. Clearly, I am Galadriel, you know. That is what I feel. So just living with honesty and integrity and the fight for the truth and the journey against good and evil, and all of that kind of thing incredible escapism, good and evil, and all of that kind of thing, incredible escapism.

Speaker 2:

And the reason why I've chosen those books is because books can have a way, can't they, of really helping us at difficult times in our lives. And I discovered these books when I was going through a really difficult breakup and being able to escape into that world, that different world, where everything seemed clear cut. You know, there is good and there is evil. There's no gray area. Everyone, the people who are good, are working for their best lives. There is honesty. There is, you know, everything about life in there. But how I would like my life to be. And yeah, so that's that.

Speaker 1:

Oh, I love that. Yeah, you are the first to say that. I'm going to definitely message you if somebody else says that. Thank you so so much for being a guest on this episode. I have really loved chatting with you about all of the things and really highlighting again how impactful hypnotherapy is and how you know self-hypnosis and self-leadership will allow you to change your life beyond whatever you think is possible. So thank you so so much.

Speaker 2:

Thank you, I've loved it.

Speaker 1:

You are so, so welcome. So take care everyone. Have a great day. Follow Julie if you know that she's got something that you are intrigued by. If you have any kind of inkling, then please do click a link and reach out to her. So take care and I will see you on the next episode. Thank you for tuning into this week's episode. I hope that you're feeling energized, fearless and inspired to take action today, to stand in your greatness. I share even more tools and resources on my I Dare to Leap email newsletter. By signing up, you not only get early access to the I Dare to Leap products and services, but you also get brand new podcast episodes delivered straight to your inbox every Monday, meaning you'll never miss your weekly dose of becoming fearless energy. Sign up now at wwwidaretoleapcom. Forward slash newsletter or click the link in the show notes below.

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